Rooftop Yodeling | Posted by Jannie on 28 December 2008 @ 1:51 PM
LANCE, you are the winner!!!
Catherine said, “I’m going to have to call LANCE the winner with this post…. Thanks for the amazing and symbolic idea, Lance! And thank you Jannie, for hosting this whole thing… I’ll take a couple of photos of the disposal… Catherine”
Well, if that ain’t the greatest thing! You can read Lance’s contest entry in the comments below here. And if you aren’t familiar with Lance’s “Jungle Of Life” blog yet, you need to do yourself a favor and immerse yourself in his pool of lightness and well-being. So, in case you didn’t get it those first 4 links, the winner is Lance, Lance, Lance !!! And one more for HAPPY NEW YEAR luck, LANCE!!!!!
And I, Jannie have to personally give Glenn an honorable mention for all his totally mind-bending ideas, his is a one-off imagination for sure and I love his comments on this blog. And to each and every one of you for giving your ideas and making this such a blast, TANK THANK YOU ALL! Jannie xo
Below is the original post…
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2 days ago I linked to a certain “100 Words A Day” blog post. Remember the heartbreaking hilarity of that effing clover?
Well, it seems Catherine is up for ideas on how to best set that clover, thus herself, free.
She writes, “I plan to ceremoniously dispose of the clover on January 1. It looks pretty much EXACTLY like the pic that Jannie posted. Any good ideas for ritual clover sacrifice? Throw it off a tall building? Run it over with the car?”
Jannie suggests that Catherine toss the clover in a blender with 1/8 cup of olive oil, a raw egg, 2 cups water, one dash pepper, 2 dashes salt, one hair of her head and a squirt of liquid dish soap. Whip on highest speed for 1 minute. Then pour the mixture at the rootline of the nearest evergreen tree while chanting, “Oogie, oogie, boogie-boo, I pour this goopy-goo on you. 2008 was rather sucky. But 2009 will be effing lucky.” [ But I am, of course not eligible to participate ! ] [ Edit at 9:45 a.m. Monday the 29th. ]
How ‘bout you, Blogging Buddies?? Suggestions how Catherine might sacrifice the offending clover? And whichever idea Catherine likes best, the WINNER will receive not one, but two, YES, TWO autographed copies of Jannie’s upcoming “I Need A Man” CD !! You may enter as many tmes as you wish.
Contest closes at 12:00 noon, Central Time Dec. 31 2008.
(Offer void where prohibited. Battering not included. Objects in blog may appear closer than in reality. No newt eyes harmed in the creation of this post.)
On 28 December 2008 at 1:56 pm
Caity said,
Oh my gosh, how clever! I don’t think I could ever top the blender idea and ritual. The only things I can think of are to bury it in the backyard, give them to a leprechaun, or go up to the top of a tall mountain, grind them up, and let them go into the wind. Haha!
Caity’s last blog post..My new camera!
On 28 December 2008 at 2:25 pm
Erin M said,
seriously, no one will ever out -do your suggestion!
I say regift… to someone she doesn’t like
Erin M’s last blog post..Christmas Day
On 28 December 2008 at 2:41 pm
Jannie said,
Oh STOP! Catherine may not even like my idea. Maybe she’s allergic to raw eggs. Or was involved in a blender accident and is totally averse to the mere suggestion of one, maybe even just puked looking at that photo. I love where each and every one of your minds get to, so don’t be shy, y’all.
On 28 December 2008 at 2:57 pm
Aimee said,
“Oogie, oogie, boogie-boo, I pour this goopy-goo on you. 2008 was rather sucky. But 2009 will be effing lucky.” – Oh that is gooood! I doubt I can top it, but here’s my take:
As I’m a fan of fire, I say she disposes of her defunct clover by creating a smudge out of it. She will also need to add some sage, lavender, or cedar might be a nice touch. According to the First Nations people the smoke will attach itself to the (obvious) negative energy in her home, releasing its life-thwarting hold on her. After she is done coughing and dispelling the yucky energy, I suggest she takes the ash and seals it in a standard sized white envelope. She will then send said envelope to Ireland with a small note that reads: “You’ve screwed me for the last time Blarney!”
Aimee’s last blog post.."…now back to our regular scheduled programming"
On 28 December 2008 at 4:49 pm
Shay said,
Oh sure, blame the clover. Poor disabled lonesome clover, all alone with its leprosy. I would buy that clover its own Aveeno. I would speak gently to it and never swear at it. I would set it up in Jannie Funster’s treehouse and let it live there. Poor clover.
Shay’s last blog post..Merinos Are A Girl’s Best Friend!
On 28 December 2008 at 5:48 pm
Georgie B said,
I say, bake that bad boy.
Take said clover, throw a dash of cinnamon, dash of ginger and a dash of parsley. Heat the oven to 400 and bake for 10 minutes until crispy golden brown. Put aside to cool off.
Cook up a western omelet and after putting on a dish, take said clover and crumple over the omelet.
Consume with your favorite morning beverage.
Delicious!
Georgie B’s last blog post..Naughty, Naughty
On 28 December 2008 at 7:36 pm
Dr. Cason said,
You treat that clover tenderly. Break open the glass and remove the clover and give it the burial it deserves perhaps next to a favorite flowering tree. Think of all the good things you’ve learned in the last year however difficult it was- that way you’re not doomed to repeat it.
And then finally wish for health and happiness of a new year!
Dr. Cason’s last blog post..Friday’s Photo Challenge- Through a Child’s Eye
On 28 December 2008 at 7:52 pm
Cath Lawson said,
Hi Jannie – I like your idea. I’ve always been a bit so suspicious about these four leaf clovers anyway. I’ve found a few over the years and kept them in books and bibles and stuff and often things have gone wrong afterwards.
On 28 December 2008 at 7:54 pm
sheila said,
I say you put it in the goodwill box. Maybe a broken clover will bring someone else better luck than it did you. Don’t send it to me though…lol…my luck sucks…I think I need a 7 leaf clover.
sheila’s last blog post..It’s Just One of Those Days.
On 28 December 2008 at 9:06 pm
Heather (How to be a Woman..?) said,
I like your idea & want to see the video posted to You Tube.
But if it doesn’t work out, just stick it in the middle of a dart board at the local pub.
Heather (How to be a Woman..?)’s last blog post..Women know that stuff is just stuff
On 29 December 2008 at 3:25 am
SnaggleTooth said,
Hmm… I dunno- I’ve had bad luck with blenders…
SnaggleTooth’s last blog post..Slippery Slips
On 29 December 2008 at 4:06 am
Lance said,
Okay, I’ll play along here Jannie (hey, for you’re autograph, I’ll do anything…well…maybe not anything…but you get the idea!!).
Catherine – might I suggest:
Three things that affect us going forth – fear, uncertainty, and doubt (FUD) – can be knocked out. Take what remains of the effing clover – the three remaining leaves – and throw one each of these leaves at fear, at uncertainty, and at doubt. Knock them out of your life for 2009. And get rid of any remains of the effing clover along the way – win, win baby!!
And that whole blender idea, Jannie – great rhyme!
Lance’s last blog post..Sunday Thought For The Day
On 29 December 2008 at 4:53 am
Carla said,
I’m going to have to have a good think on this one. Unfortunately now is too late for me to think straight about anything. I’ll be back. Too much fun.
Carla’s last blog post..Culinary Curiosities
On 29 December 2008 at 7:15 am
Jewel/Pink Ink said,
I suggest that she has newts use it for a parachute.
Newt Parachute…mmm, has a nice ring to it.
Jewel/Pink Ink’s last blog post..I’m Back
On 29 December 2008 at 8:51 am
Lynn said,
I like the blender idea the best, although Georgie’s omelet is a close second.
I say – return it to the earth from whence it came.
Lynn’s last blog post..Resolutions? None for me. How about you?
On 29 December 2008 at 9:50 am
Glenn Buttkus said,
Catherine, yes, you must dispose of that effing clover before New Year’s Eve. The Universe has had its way with you, laughing all the way as it looked at your broken leaf “good luck” charm. Here are some other ways to shed yourself of this green bad luck:
Note: It all starts with breaking the glass to remove the effing thing, but that in itself could be a precursor of more bad luck, so use a glass cutter, or boil it until the seals melt.
1. Weave it into a rabbit bracelet. Find a rabbit who will wear it proudly over one of their feet.
2. Soak it in honey and powdered sugar and feed it to any wandering bear that might happen by, or badger, or anteater.
3. Leave it in a collection plate at whatever house of worship you attend; attach a warning note with it, instructing the priest or minister to do a mini-exorcism on it, thus removing the dark luck.
4. Scotch tape it to a post card addressed to Bin Laden in Afganistan.
5. Lie it gently down in the treadtracks near a front tire of the nearest Hummer.
6. Wrap it in green tissue paper and make a bundle out of it, and have it shipped to the mayor of Dublin.
7. Eat it–any way you can, on Mexican food, Italian, Greek, or possibly Chinese; the msg will neutralize the joo-joo perhaps.
8. Paste it to a rock, then put it in a green bra and stand on the lip of the Grand Canyon, and fling it for all you worth, baby.
9. Go on a cruise, and wrap it up in Carnival Lines napkins, and flush it into the bowels of the ship.
10. Take a flight in a bi-plane and let it ride the winds at 10,000 feet.
11. Put it in the Sears Catalog; the one in your cousin’s outhouse in Tennessee. Being placed in the fecal pit, it will be joyful midst the fumes and fertile environs.
12. Send it to Shay and she will teach it French, and take it to Paris, and leave it on the steps of Notre Dame, with a note saying,”Please take me home.”
13. Remove the sad leaf, and live with the now liberated three leaf clover.
14. Blindfold it, blow cigarette smoke in its face, and shoot it.
15. Bake it into brownies and send them to Tommy Chong.
16. Have it gold-plated and sent it to Madonna.
17. Sew it into the right side of your green bra, hike up the tallest mountain near you, and hang it there on top for God to forgive.
I hope one of these will be an excellent solution.
Glenn
Glenn Buttkus’s last blog post..Snowmocycle
On 29 December 2008 at 9:56 am
Glenn Buttkus said,
If I am lucky enough to win those incredible autographed CD’s, I would be proud to present one of them to Doug Palmer in Seattle who would treasure it almost as much as I.
I the realm of superstition, I wonder where the four leaf clover finds itself? Is is not as lucky as a rabbit’s foot, or worry rock, or chrystal? I wonder if it’s real? Perhaps it’s plastic, a phoney, and that’s why the rash of bad vibes.
Glenn
Glenn Buttkus’s last blog post..Snowmocycle
On 29 December 2008 at 10:09 am
Jannie said,
Oh, Dear people. YOU MAKE ME LAUGH!!!!!
And I have just added that edit that says I am not eligible to win, being the Grande Poobah Contest Creator and all! As I mentioned in some e-mails, please forgive my errant ways as Jannie is new to the CONTEST realm.
And isn’t it weird how I sometimes refer to myself in the third person, as I just did in that last sentence??
On 29 December 2008 at 10:22 am
Tammy said,
Hey Jannie-who could possibly top your suggestion?
Anyway it is my thought that she should fly the said clover to Ireland, walk into a tavern and shove it up the ass of a leprechaun. Then, take the leprechaun captive, boil him in a barrel of Irish liquor and burn him at the stake.
Then, she should get one of those giant hands (like people take to baseball games) except hers would be flipping a bird………she should strip naked, while marching down the streets of Ireland (flipping off passersby), and singing this little dirge:
Ireland, Ireland your tale of the clover
has driven me to madness,
but a keg of your liquor has brought me joy and gladness.
Ireland, Ireland shove those clovers up your ass
This stroke of bad luck shall soon pass.
Then she should come to America, gather a group of her friends on New Years Day and do a bra flinging ritual.
On 29 December 2008 at 10:29 am
Tammy said,
Hey, you know what is funny? I don’t know when your friend Glen posted his comment, but i just read it after i posted mine, and ha ha that cannot be topped!
On 29 December 2008 at 11:06 am
Talon said,
So many fantastic suggestions it will be difficult for Catherine to choose. I still haven’t received the copy of the 2009 Ritual Clover Sacrifice Manual from Emerald Isle Productions, but I’m sure any of the many suggestions would suffice in a pinch. I especially like Jannie’s blender idea, Georgie B’s omelet and Shay’s tender treatment plan (who wouldn’t want to live in that fabulous tree house??). Mind you, Glenn’s suggestion number 8 sounds fun! And, like Tammy’s, is becoming popular – lol!
On 29 December 2008 at 12:12 pm
Jannie said,
You all, I am not at liberty to single out suggestions here, but let it be known you all rock in more ways than I could ever tell you!!!!!
I’m so happy I just flung my old green bra at a leprechaun!
On 29 December 2008 at 1:12 pm
wade said,
the problem was not the clover. It was the display of the clover. Four leaf clovers are to be kept hidden, according to Irish lore.Displaying them or giving them away is bad luck (if you are a Druid).Besides, the three leafs left are still valuable. One is for sunshine, the other it rained, the third is for roses that bloom in the lane.
On 29 December 2008 at 1:35 pm
Lane Savant said,
Leave the clover where it is but don’t pay any attention to it.
Move it’s office to the basement.
Don’t give it anything to do.
Don’t answer it’s e-mails.
Promote three-leaved clover and blades of grass over it.
Signed for
Dilbert
by L.Savant
Lane Savant’s last blog post..Snowmoblile
On 29 December 2008 at 3:06 pm
Catherine said,
Wait, am I supposed to wear the green bra, or is the clover/rock supposed to be wrapped in a green bra? I’m a little unclear on that. Another detail that could spur ideas: I live near the Golden Gate Bridge. So any form of throwing, chucking, or launching might do well to take place there. I am loving this, you guys! Thank for helping me give a bad year a fun exclamation point at the end!
On 29 December 2008 at 4:10 pm
Cricket/Tammy said,
Oh me…..the old green bra! I don’t have one of those. (see comment above to understand this one. Everyone else is talking about the clover and I am talking about the green bra)
Still thinking on this.
Cricket/Tammy’s last blog post..Sometimes
On 29 December 2008 at 5:18 pm
karyn said,
I say cremate it, put it in an urn that looks like leperkon (spelling is way off.. sorry) then on a windy day let the wind take the ashes out to sea.
On 29 December 2008 at 8:28 pm
Renee said,
You are all wrong. The clover cost her the fiance, the purse, and the job. The only way to undo the curse is by having sex on the job with a fiance (it doesn’t have to be yours) while clutching a purse with your toes. Then you shall be free.
Renee’s last blog post..Dryad Sculpture nearing completion…
On 29 December 2008 at 9:52 pm
Mama Zen said,
“Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world’s first bionic clover. This clover. Better than he was before. Better. Stronger. Faster.”
Mama Zen’s last blog post..Thought For The Day
On 29 December 2008 at 10:31 pm
Mia said,
Hey. It’s all green. Clover chopping celebration?
What to do? Eat it and ingest all the luck she can. Maybe add a little salt, but other than that…down the hatch?
Mia’s last blog post..Merry Christmas
On 29 December 2008 at 11:09 pm
Momisodes said,
OMG! that is hilarious!!!!
Momisodes’s last blog post..It Finally Happened. I Cracked.
On 30 December 2008 at 7:01 am
Jannie said,
You guys are TOO FUNNY!!!!! xo
On 30 December 2008 at 10:05 am
Glenn Buttkus said,
Well heck, there seems to be no end to the wunderbar suggestions for Catherine. Let’s add some more:
18) Paint the effing clover red and paste it 200 feet up on a girder on the Golden Gate bridge,and tell all the Devil made you do it.
19)Go to a Victoria’s Secret store, where green bras can be purchased, and buy nine of them. Have eight girlfriends make up a firing squad. Drive a stake into the corner of your backyard. Drive a green tack into the heart of the clover, pinning it to the post. You and the ladies load green rocks in your green bras. Have Jannie on the phone to give the countdown, and on “Fling” let loose the fury of hard greeness. No one but God will ever know whose rock killed the effing clover, and that way the bad luck will disappate and not settle on anyone else’s upcoming year.
20) Find a friendly snake, and tape the clover to it, and ship it to Rio de Janerio, with a note that says,
“Please tred on me, for I have offended Catherine.”
21) Chop it into a fine green powder, and smuggle it into the bosses office where she lost the job, and slide it into a coffee filter, so the boss’s morning caffeine fix will fix him for good.
22)Go to the gym where her former boyfriend pumps iron, find his locker, and sew it into his jock strap.
23) After the all girl firing squad has killed off the effing clover, then mix it with Cheeia seeds, grow some green hair on a Homor Simpson Cheeia pothead, wrap the green bra around it, and chuck it off the Golden Gate bridge exactly at midnight on New Year’s Eve.
24) Catch that dog that always craps in your yard, and duct tape the effing clover under its tail, reducing the bad luck to dog feces paper.
25) Bury the clover in a green potato, and shove it into a green paper bag, and put it in a Greyhound cargo hold bound for Humptulips, WA.
26) Mix it with peanuts and feed it to an elephant.
27) Go to one of those wrecking yards where the cars are crushed to cubes, and put it gently into a glovebox of a 1977 Cadillac, and hang around to make sure it is smashed into a cube, then wave good bye.
28) Paste it to the wings of a radio controlled plane with a six foot wing span, and have someone fly it out to sea until it runs out of gas and has to make a water landing. Perhaps Davy Jones will dig it.
I hope one of these will suffice.
Glenn
Glenn Buttkus’s last blog post..Military Honors at Fort Yates, ND, 12/20/1890
On 30 December 2008 at 10:58 am
Jannie said,
Oh, Dear Lord… what active imaginations run amok here.
On 30 December 2008 at 12:25 pm
Miladysa said,
Wrap it up and give it to someone’s ex – preferably a cheating pig of an ex ;D
Miladysa’s last blog post..75. Encounter
On 30 December 2008 at 9:23 pm
sharkbutt said,
Render it with ducttape, an excellent depilatory as well.
Or bury it within the contents of an especially filthy catbox, bag that in paper not plastic, take it to an offenders home, set alight, ring run.
On 31 December 2008 at 12:21 am
Stephanie said,
I say put it in the bottom of a bottle of Rum, or other favored drink, similar to the worm in the tequila. Pass the bottle around and whomever is lucky enough to get the effing clover in their glass is stuck with it for 2009.
Stephanie’s last blog post..Lucky Cricket
On 31 December 2008 at 2:54 am
SnaggleTooth said,
I believe Glenn has found the way to win the war on terrorism! with #4. Scotch tape it to a post card addressed to Bin Laden in Afganistan.
(My solution was already posted on http://100wordsaday.com/?p=1427
previously, n I stand by it-)
[Are you sure that’s the prob?
Defective lucky charms should be burnt or salted to stop their magic powers…]
Wade has a point too!
It took a long time to read these commentz cus it’s too funny-
SnaggleTooth’s last blog post..Slippery Slips
On 31 December 2008 at 10:01 am
Cricket/Tammy said,
If the engagement was broken this year then it sounds like it gave you good luck. I would keep it another year. I’ll bet another will come your way.
Cricket/Tammy’s last blog post..Attacked me today
On 31 December 2008 at 10:11 am
Catherine said,
Today’s the day! Thanks for all the fantastic ideas…
On 31 December 2008 at 11:27 am
Jannie said,
YESSS!! Today is the day of the clover’s reckoning.
Once Catherine has made her selection I will announce the winner at the top of the post — in big bold green font. Contest will close in 33 minutes from the time I post this humble comment.
Jannie xo
On 31 December 2008 at 11:37 am
Miladysa said,
Happy New Year Jannie x
Miladysa’s last blog post..76. Is This Death?
On 31 December 2008 at 12:02 pm
Jannie said,
Thanks, Miladysa. Happy New Year to you.
CONTEST NOW CLOSED!!!
On 31 December 2008 at 2:23 pm
Christina Martin said,
Why oh why didn’t I discover this blog sooner?
Christina Martin’s last blog post..Might I suggest a New Years resolution?
On 1 January 2009 at 1:03 am
Talon said,
Congratulations, Lance!
Talon’s last blog post..Reflections…
On 1 January 2009 at 3:32 am
SnaggleTooth said,
Applaudes as Lance bows
SnaggleTooth’s last blog post..Slippery Slips
On 1 January 2009 at 8:08 am
Jannie said,
Christina: WELCOME!! (It’s her first time here, guys.) It is my great humble pleasure to welcome you aboard this luau ship. It’s gonna be fun and I look forward to visiting your blog too!
And yes, congrat, Lance. Hey you won Vered’s contest too, deservedly so.
And Everybody, thanks. AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
On 1 January 2009 at 6:03 pm
Lance said,
Great contest Jannie! And many great entries to choose from.
And…I won a Jannie CD — woo-hoo!!! I’m so excited!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!! (he says, while doing a little happy dance!)
Lance’s last blog post..This Challenged Me – Part 2
On 2 January 2009 at 9:49 pm
Jannie said,
Lance: You deserve it! Thanks for everythign.
On 3 January 2009 at 9:06 pm
Jeanne said,
Jannie,
One hair of the head, huh? Girl, have you been reading Harry Potter?? What’s it called again… Polyjuice Potion??
Jeanne
P.S. I’m sorry I found this post way too late to get in on the fun, Jannie, but thank you for being so effective at making me laugh (as always)!!
Jeanne’s last blog post..Infertility?? Check Out Alicia’s ‘Mommy Wannabe Club’ To Connect With Others!!