Yesterday, When She Was Seven
The Pea | Posted by Jannie on 11 September 2009 @ 7:03 AM 43 Comments
Yep, our Kelly’s 8 today! She was born here in Austin on 9-11-01 at 2:10 p.m. It was 3:10 in NYC.
Nothing like videotaping her 7-year-old interview at the eleventh hour — yesterday late afternoon, to be precise. I’ll post more clips in the future, but for now I give you… “I’d Rather Be A Girl.” (Transcript included below in case you have trouble making out the words.)
Transcript…
Me: Kelly — question 41. If you could be somebody else for just one day, who would you be?
Kelly: Either you, my dad or Genevieve my friend, or my best friend, Isabella.
Me: So, why would you want to be me for a day?
Kelly: Because I wouldn’t have to go to school.
Me: Yah.
Kelly: Actually, I wouldn’t want to be my dad.
Me: No?
Kelly: Because the privates — I wouldn’t know how to work the privates.
Me: (Laughter.) You don’t know how to work the male privates.
Kelly: No.
Me: If you had them you’d probably know what to do with them, tho.
Kelly: I wouldn’t wanna know what to do anyway.
Me: (Profusive cackling)
Kelly: So I’d rather be a girl.
On 11 September 2009 at 7:55 am Renee said,
Happy Birthday Kelly! I’d always rather be a girl, too! I STILL am not sure what to do with those privates….
Renee
On 11 September 2009 at 8:15 am Glenn Buttkus said,
A very happy birthday to the 9-11 girl! I want you to show her the remarks she made about “those privates” when she is 18 years old, has been dating for several years, and is ready to go off to college! Kind of like those naked butt baby pictures our Moms have that they like to show to our teenage friends, enit? Actually, for Kelly to be born on 9-11 is a big deal, maybe even cooler than being born on Christmas or the 4th of July or Thanksgiving or New Years. Rick Mom’s daughter was born on a day like that. Just another reason that Kelly is special.
Glenn
On 11 September 2009 at 8:21 am Glenn Buttkus said,
That would be more correctly Rick Mobb’s daughter, Ada Corinna, born on the 4th of July; a real fireworks babe.
Being a 9/11 baby though, is like being a December 7th child, with the universe balancing out the infamy of the attacks with the entrance of something sweet, smart, and ready to change this mean old world.
blue bunny will be fine, by the way, for he needs to understand that levity and epithets can go hand in hand or paw to tail.
On 11 September 2009 at 10:46 am Talon said,
Happy Birthday, Dear Kelly! They grow too fast, Jannie, and I don’t have to remind you to appreciate every second because you not only appreciate it, you share it.
It’s lovely that there’s good in bad, isn’t there? Otherwise life wouldn’t be worth a damn. (and tell Kelly there’s good in those men privates, too!)
On 11 September 2009 at 11:37 am sheila said,
OH
MY
GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She’s hysterical! lol.
That was the greatest thing I’ve seen in many weeks Jannie Funster, wonderful for you to post that!
On 11 September 2009 at 11:53 am Nadia - Happy Lotus said,
Hi Jannie,
That is so funny and honest. That is what I love about kids, they are just so open. It is a shame that many lose that as they get older.
Anyway, have a fun time celebrating. Happy birthday, Kelly!
On 11 September 2009 at 12:24 pm Carol | Stress Eating said,
Oh, my! My daughter would shoot me if I posted something like that! I hope she’s a good sport when she gets older and sees it in a different light! Thanks for the grins!
On 11 September 2009 at 12:44 pm Jannie said,
Renee: If you find out the secret trick to “those” privates, let me know too okay.
Glenn: Rick Mobb. Rick Mobb. Why does that not ring a bell for me? As to blue bunny, I try to understand and respect his point of view. He is my greatest teacher. And he says bad werds sometimes too. I heard him let out a string of them when I stepped on his front paws the other day.
Talon: Sweet words, as usual. Thank you. I will write more about her birthday story in the future. As to male parts, so many bridges for us to cross with the birds and the bees, I’m sure you’ve crossed them all with flying colors and that I’ll cross them just fine too and all will be revealed in the fullness of time for Kelly, more than likely her peers will tell her lots of interesting stuff about the man parts and their usage too, Oy! Funny what they share in school, she tells me everything, which is so sweet. And OMG, she’s heard the “t%ts” word for breasts, a story which would actually make a pretty entertaining post.
Sheila: This post may not be for some, I thought about before I hit publish, as humor can be a pretty subjective field to play ball on. But glad you got it and enjoyed her thoughts as much as I did. She sure cracked me up, as was apparent. It was the funniest thing (to me,) in the whole 39-minute interview of 50 questions.
Nadia: She cracks me up like that several times a day with her ruminations on things. Thank your for sharing thoughts. And celebrations yes — she will have opened her present by now, a necklace I put in her lunch box. Then “Birthday Circle” at her school at 2:30 today. Then dinner out with old Ma & Pa tonight. Then her roller skating party tomorrow. Boy will I be ready to relax tomorrow evening!
Carol: It will be interesting to see if she wants me to take it down when she is older, which I will oblige her on of course. I hope she will see it for the sweetness and humor I find in it. But you;’re right — you never know. On my “I Need A Man,”CD there is a song she wrote and recorded, and even tho it’s just about as sweet and dear a little voice singing a precious song as ever has been heard, she absolutely cringes when she hears it.
On 11 September 2009 at 1:33 pm vered - blogger for hire said,
Happy birthday Kelly! You’re a smart girl.
On 11 September 2009 at 1:57 pm Aimee said,
Happy Birthday Kelly!
She is too dang funny…much like her mom! This would be a great video to show her on her wedding day ha ha
On 11 September 2009 at 2:08 pm Patricia said,
Happy Birthday to Kelly – wow to be a 9-11 kiddo in the US Such a promise of hope!
Thank you for sharing, I hope you will not embarrass her with this – she will just enjoy it for being herself if she chooses to watch it on her own one day
How neat that you do this interview and tape it – nice, sweet and important memory maker
On 11 September 2009 at 2:13 pm Lynn said,
What a day for you that was!!!! And a great day it is. Happy Birthday Kelly!!!! You are a fun girl like your mom!!!! xoxoxo
On 11 September 2009 at 5:47 pm G said,
Wow.
First, an absolutely priceless video there.
Second, a very happy b’day to Kelly.
Finally, that should be your alternate saying for your blog. “Home of the Big Ass Eye. All seeing and all knowing.”
On 11 September 2009 at 9:22 pm Matthew Dryden said,
That is a beautiful thing!
On 11 September 2009 at 9:43 pm Karen said,
Happy Birthday Kelly! She is so deep! What a cool kid you have there.
On 11 September 2009 at 10:54 pm Lance said,
Happy #8 Kelly!
Happy Birthday young Kelly
Happy Birthday with cake and jelly.
You look like your Mommy-roo
And you act like her too!!
(sung to the Happy Birthday song)
On 12 September 2009 at 3:36 am SnaggleTooth said,
Happy Day Kelly!
Lucky you Jannie, having good memories of that fatefull Day. Must be tough for you to hear all this other stuff to do with that date. I hadn’t realized that before-
Yep, Kelly is a real deep thinker! This because that- Soon to be world-class chess champ perhaps. She’d need to know how to use those pieces, tho!
On 12 September 2009 at 8:09 am Paige said,
Well leave it to me to miss little Funster Jr’s birthday. {hugs}
I had a dream once that I had those privates and it very weird and I didn’t know what to do with ‘em to be sure. Thank God that I woke up and that is was only a dream cause I like being a girl.
On 12 September 2009 at 11:11 am Jannie said,
Why does our cat he think it’s his job to be our alarm clock on Saturday too?
Anyway, I digress already.
Vered:
Thank you. I’ll pass along the birthday wishes.
Aimee: It is weird for us girls to think of carrying around those packages 24 / 7.
Patricia: I wonder now if I should have even posted this, with the potential embarassment factor for her. I guess I’ll see.
Lynn: Hello! Her party is early this afternoon, after which time I’ll come home and sleep. Darn kitty alarm clock. I’ll tell her you wished her well, thanks. xoxox
G: I LOVE your idea of home of the all-seeing eye. And home of the all-knowing eye. I will use those as alternates, thanks! My eye does see and know all, yes. Right into the soul of all my peeps.
Hey Matthew.
have a great Canadian day!
Karen: She is cool, yes. And deep. It will be fun to put together a few more highlights of this interview, if I can figure out how to fit them all into one short video. if others can do it — so can Jannie Funster!
Lance: Thank you! I’ll sing that for her. Hey, and potentially just 13 more hours until your Sunday Thought For The Day, whoo hoo!!!
Snag: That’s right, I had started this blog on Sept 22nd of last year, so just a bit after her birthday. Which reminds me– what WILL I do for my first annual blogoversary?? I’m sure I’ll come up with something wild and potentially readable. An online chess match perhaps?
Paige: Well, her actual party is today so you got the greeting in on time.
I never have had a dream like that. Interesting. I like being a girl too! As I said above to Aimee, it would be weird carrying around that equipment everywhere, tho I’m sure our male counterparts hardly ever give it a second thought. 
On 12 September 2009 at 4:27 pm TheWeyrd1 said,
I’m with Kelly re: male privates…heh
On 12 September 2009 at 6:11 pm Cindy said,
That is so cute and funny
On 12 September 2009 at 6:58 pm Rhett said,
Well, she’s practical! I think the well-spring of all her charm is her crystal clear practical virgo mind. When I was a kid, I remember I’d say “practical” things which to elders would seem funny. I do stand by my “practicality” though even today and I’m sure she’d too!
On 13 September 2009 at 2:51 am cinderkeys said,
Bwahahaha.
20 years from now she’ll be really happy you saved the recording.
On 13 September 2009 at 7:19 am Rhett said,
O well, forgot to say: Happy Birthday to Kelly!
On 13 September 2009 at 8:37 am robbi said,
Frusspott; The childrens mantra, WYSWYG, and in their honesty because they cannot embellish what they don’t know, is the truth, plain un-varnished but more so
un-tarnished. Not only is it plain and as they see it in B/W, but untouched by cant.
On 13 September 2009 at 9:41 am Carla said,
That’s great! Trust kids to just tell it like it is.
On 13 September 2009 at 10:47 am Jannie said,
Weyrd1:
And is there really a string of 6 blue bunnies in a row next? I think that’s a record.
Cindy: I thought so too!
Rhett: There is a lot to be said for being practical, indeed. Thanks, I will pass on your birthday wishes to her.
Cinderkeys: I’m going to get some USB flash drives to further back up my stuff. Good idea, I think.
Robbi: You have grown very sage! Sager and sager. I like sage btw, in my Thanksgiving dinner and my blogging buddies.
Carla: Sweet innocent things they say indeed.I never get tired of listening to her.
On 13 September 2009 at 3:56 pm Ana said,
What a wonderful interview. It’s so lovely to hear the honesty resides in your young ladies heart. That truly is a cherishable experience. Happy 8th Birthday to Kelly.
On 13 September 2009 at 11:07 pm Cath Lawson said,
A belated happy birthday to Kelly. I loved your idea of switching places with your mom to skip school.
On 14 September 2009 at 12:13 am Trey - Swollen Thumb Entertainment said,
So much for Sigmund Freud’s theory of penis envy. lol. Your little girl is hilarious. Born on 9/11 though? Wow, how strange that must have been for you. “Where were you when the world stopped turning?” “I was going into labor!”
On 14 September 2009 at 1:20 am Davina said,
Hi Jannie. And belated happy birthday Kelly. Good interview — can I have your autograph?
On 14 September 2009 at 2:02 am teahouseblossom said,
Happy belated birthday to her! My birthday is 9/11 as well, although I’m a wee bit older.
On 14 September 2009 at 3:19 am J.D. Meier said,
Happy Birthday to Kelly and many more.
Who writes her material? It’s good stuff. It’s so from the hip and it goes straight for the funny bone.
On 14 September 2009 at 7:17 am Jannie said,
I’ll be back! Kelly to school now.
On 14 September 2009 at 9:17 am Dot said,
She’s hilarious!
On 14 September 2009 at 9:22 am Ching Ya said,
Happy Birthday Kelly!! (finally, the right post for the right greeting)
I have so much laughter watching this clip! I bet you know exactly where I laughed the most! haha.. she’s just so adorable. So smart by the way! ^^
@wchingya
Social/Blogging Tracker
On 14 September 2009 at 11:02 am Jannie said,
Ana: Isn’t she just a precious little gal? And funny just being who she is.
Cath: Thank for popping in. Maybe someday she WILL get to stay home and blog, write songs and do buttock lifts all day.
Trey: LOVED your comment! No penis envy indeed, ha ha. Blows Freud’s theory right outta the water! Still chuckling here at your words. I will write about her birth story sometime.
Davina: I’ll send you a gold-plated autograph some time! And frame it with diamonds.
Teahouse Blossom: A happy belated one to you too!
J.D. The former Jerry Seinfeld staff writes for her.
Dot: Glad this ticked your humor sensibilities. And rad new gravatar!! New hair-do?
Ching Ya: Did my new-ish “comments at the top” of the post throw you off? Thanks for popping in. It’s funny, on the way to school today I told her a lot of my blogging buddies had wished her a happy birthday and she asked “Well, which ones did NOT??
On 14 September 2009 at 11:55 am Chris said,
THIS IS PRECIOUS! I LOVE KELLY! Hope she had a wonderful birthday! xxOO
On 14 September 2009 at 12:15 pm Jan Lundy said,
Jannie, oh this is too cute and I am so glad I came here today. Loved seeing your dear Kelly and you in your glory. Now I have a sweet face and contagious laugh to put with your letter. Love it! xo
p.s. And tell Kelly from me that I hope I will always be a girl, forever and beyond! Girls rock.
On 15 September 2009 at 7:37 pm Yaya said,
That is HILARIOUS!
On 15 September 2009 at 8:00 pm Rose said,
That’s just too funny. Kids say the darndest things
On 16 September 2009 at 2:59 pm Thomma Lyn said,
Oh my goodness, Jannie, she’s just adorable. So cute and candid and sweet. What a joy!
On 18 September 2009 at 6:21 am Jannie said,
Thank you, Chris. A very lovely birthday, yes. A roller skating party. We had the table reserved from 1 to 3, but after that the kids could skate until 11:00 p.n. if they wanted. I think we stayed until 4:00.
Hey Jan-Jan: I am so glad you came to this post too! Girls do totally rock, yah! Not that I don’t like guys — I like them very very much. But you know what I mean, I likes being a girl too.
Yaya, Rose and Thomma Lyn, really glad you guys liked it too.
Yay! It was good. It was good.