my jannie was hopping to show yoo some new viddio todae of she singing, butt she komputer cot on fier and explodid last nite. she is fine tho, except for a milde konkussins. and i haz onlee a few berned wiskirs. and my tale. and the kat, but onlee his furs on his left sied.
so i posting wile my jannie stil asleeping. i hop she wil be prowd of me i up so erlee and werking harde. maybee she raze my salliry to $2.10 dollirs a week, espeshilly sinse my speling iz so improoving.
so heer we goes…
these fotos iz all frum the day my kelly got her casting off she arm. one monts ago, i tink.
i taeked all these myself.
heer iz my kelly in one of the big rumes in the texis kapitul bilding.
heer is my kelly in frunt of the bilding with some tall guys woo nevir moving a mussel. (i evin came bak next dae to wotch them, but they nevir evir moved evin one littel bite.)
heer is my kelly wating for the doctir to come and take she casting off.(she wuz hoping to brake she other arm, I think, dansing all around the tabel.she is mutch ennergees, my kelly.)
and heer is my kelly in frunt of happee noodle chubbie hugging time of funs. my jannie and my kelly lieks the name of it.and i lieks they karrits iz alweys fressh.and onse they gived me a free plastic spoone for my cabbige soop.
so that iz it for todae.
i hops we get yoo some viddio soone, i thinks next frydae the 18, becuz my jannie posting another exciting thing on tuesdae the 15.
wit love and infeckshuns — blue bunny manigemints
BUTT WATE!!! THERE”S MOR!!!!! my jannie’s sister just opined up her very own new blogg. hoo-woo!!!!! I bet my rosie rosann would lov if you pooped in to say hello to she.
3. Hang out at Austin’s Driskill Hotel drinking margaritas, eating fine food and making new friends.
3. Hang out at the airport (until I get booted out) with an official-looking clipboard, asking strangers if they blog and if they do, hand them my business card.
4. Hang out at the bus station (until I get booted out) with an official-looking clipboard, asking strangers why they’re taking the bus and not driving or flying. (Be prepared for long rambling answers and / or marriage proposals.)
5. Hang out at a park all day doing nothing but going up and down the tallest slide, being careful not to bowl too many toddlers over.
7. Cook a 7-course meal to surprise my family.
8. Hike in unmarked woods with nothing in my backpack but 5 waters, 4 beers, 3 donuts, 2 jumbo packs of beef jerky, 1 roll of “bathroom tissue,” hand sanitizer, 2 extra bras, my new iPhone and my Burt’s Bees lip balm with zinc.
9. Take the earliest possible flight to NYC to spend the day at the Metropolitan Museum of Art in the stained glass rooms. Also, hang out in the Ancient Egypt rooms looking mysterious in my silver lame unitard and another kind of hat, like this…
10. Stay in bed reading nothing but blogs all day, getting up only to powder my nose, snag more Almond Joys from the freezer, champagne from the fridge and accept the pizza delivery.
And you? What are some things you could do tomorrow, but probably won’t?
Seriously Weird | Posted by Jannie on 25 September 2009 @ 2:16 PM
47 Comments
The Czar?King? President? – yah, the President (that’s him!) of Bulgaria, one of this blog’s many lurkers, is flying us and a bunch of our friends over there for camping this weekend! In his private post-Concorde era Mach17 jet! Yay — camping in Bulgaria! What a dream come true!!!!
Kelly and her pals are so excited about the much-touted flaming marshmallow toss, the trampling of the moldy tomatoes and pin-the-cat on the blind-folded wild donkey.
And we big kids can’t wait for “the beer dunk,” whatever that is — but it sounds great.
(Whoops, for those of you who may have missed my blog’s first birthday celebration post a few days ago, JannieFunster.com is getting super-duper popular in Bulgaria. Huge huge fans over there.
And of course President Georgi* (Or Parvi, as he likes me to call him,) though far too shy to leave blog comments, e-mails me like, TEN times a day. And sends jokes. And pictures, like this one from yesterday…
That Parvi! Always up for a little humor break from his busy political day.
Anyway, gotta be at the airport in a little over an hour, rushing soon to pick Kelly up from school. Just wanted to give you the heads-up that I’ll be away from computer until Sunday, maybe Monday if I’m jet-lagged. Possibly even Tuesday, depending on how that whole Mach17 after-effect thing goes.
No Internet for me in the woods of Bulgaria, boo hoo — Parvi condones only wilderness-style camping. He writes “Miss Foonster — NO komputer on kamping! NO eye-phone! NO plastik forke! NO wirings in your upper undergarment!”
Unfortunately, they do have a 7-child hammock limit in Bulgaria, but I’m sure Kelly and her pals will make do just fine.
And off I go! The Mach17 awaits.
xo
* The President of Bulgaria is not to be confused with their Prime Minister, who also exists. Educational here at Funsterland, huh?! Who knew?
Seriously Weird | Posted by Jannie on 17 June 2009 @ 7:23 AM
49 Comments
hi, Blue bunny here. thanks for chusing me for my jannies kommints grabatar. we gonna has so much funs bogging togedder!
i is real cute, eh? foto is from the day my kelly bringed me home.
you has any kuestions about me or my jannie? i not to shy to tell ALL the sekrits of my jannie, hee-hee. my jannie is on vakasions in her minde for a few days but if you asks kuestions i wil anser wit my jannies spookie big eye, telling only the real troots – not macaronis and 3-legs goats and stuffs like my jannie makes up for entertanmints.
I have no idea who Tara is, the sprite who incited both Deeper Issues Dot and Passing Thru Betsy to honor me with meme action, but I thank her deeply for this opportunity to share more deeply true Jannie.
1. Who is the hottest movie star?
Larry of the Three Stooges is my all-time fav, but if we’re talking contemporary actors, I like that Russell Crowe guy. Girl-wise, I like Uma Thurman.
2. Apart from your house and car, what’s the most expensive thing you’ve ever bought?
Definitely my genuine-imitation Mr. Spock belt buckle, as seen on tv. A $379.99 value I scored for only $19.99.
Next most expensive thing, my good-used marble cheese tray for $17.50.
3. What’s your most treasured memory?
Oh, I have so many, but the June Saturday afternoon I got my green wrestling outfit when I was 13 springs to mind. I was so energized by the shiny spandex, I put ”Big Mike” McGillicuddy in a headlock for 30 minutes until he finally aplogized for teasing me all those years about my knobby knees. Then all of us kids on both sides of the long-standing feud kissed, made up and went for shakes at the Dairy Dip where my Uncle Sylvester dropped by with his 3-legged goat, Miriam.
4. What was the best gift you ever received as a child?
The box of elbow macaroni Aunt Freda brought me from Italy. I still have half of it.
5. What’s the biggest mistake you’ve made?
Putting salt instead of sugar in Uncle Sylvester’s birthday cake. Whoops. Miriam ate it, tho. Stole the whole thing right off the picnic table and lived to “maaa” the tale.
6. 4 words to describe yourself.
Spritely. Optimistic. Forgiving. Infinite.
7. What was your highlight or lowlight of 2008?
Getting the Christmas tree early was so great! Jim brought it home the day after Thanksgiving, a real nice fir that had slid off some old guy’s truck at a red light. Lowlight of 2008 — missing out on the bake sale at church ’cause I had to sit with the cat at the vet’s all day due to his post-neutering psychosomatica. I heard there was divinity fudge. And candy apples. And baklava flaking so lightly and honeyed it could make angels cry for weeks.
8. Favorite film?
Three! Waking Ned Divine. Ghostbusters. How To Hook A Rug In Four Minutes.
9. Tell me one thing I don’t know about you.
I wear a full-body vintage girdle every day. Like this one…
10. If you were a comic book / strip character, who would you be?
I would be the stick-person named Susan Lam that Kelly created and centers her adventure stories around.
Bonus question: What’s one stupid thing you did today, Jannie?
Didn’t let the water run at least 45 seconds first thing in the morning before drinking some.
Ta-da!
Okay you guys know what’s coming next, right? I’m supposed to pass this on to seven of you. But I’m gonna make it 10, ’cause I like the number 10, it’s so… Metric System.
So, here goes. And if anybody feels left out, please e-mail me and let me know you’d like to be tagged for my next meme, as I have no way of knowing who likes meming and who wants to avoid it like a rabid pigeon on a sugar-high.
May I please share with you some of the latest keywords that actual humans actually typed to land on this, my humble site, as shown by my Google stats? Why, thank you, I’d be delighted!
- almost passed out at sink
- asparagus tea
- ass-less hipwaders
- bra consultants
- being a drunk [Yup, that's me!] - do greencarders need passport
- duct tape depilatory
- dylan thomas bra [Well, I never knew! Did you?] - even amidst fierce flames the golden lotus can be planted
- eye-bug-you [Well, sorry, that's just the way I came.] - fat guy in hip waders
- film with jannie the christian girl
- funstermagic [I like to think so!]
- fuzzy cookie monster pants
- granniepanties
- honest things in this world [Thanks, I do try.] - how to play mission impossible on a ukulele
- I hear god’s voice in my head. Am i crazy?
- I’ve got a chainsaw [Bring it on!]
- jannie supermodel [Hope I didn't disappoint.] - jock straps with four leaf clovers
- male bra fittings
- margarita drunk vs wine drunk
- missing things from the eighties
- mortuary assistant cover letter
- poem great farting contest [What !?]
- real life pictures of loose pants
- real good poems about people running away
- shih tzu puppy eats potpourri
- shortest bike shorts
- talon twinkle [Yes, she does, doesn't she!] - ten things an ideal woman should have [Glad you noticed.]
- thick fuzzy underwear
- totally jannie
- wedgie dojo exercise video
- what mean asparagus hunted you
What about you guys – any “interesting” keywords that landed folks on your site lately?
If you too have Google Analytics but are not sure how to get to the keywords section, do this… Dashboard >Traffic sources > Keywords. Easy!
photo credit: Six Until Me
Friends, you had some seriously great tagline ideas for me, thanks!! In fact, there are over 20 I’ll be using in as many upcoming weeks. And now that I can make a widget link “button” – holy cow – I gonna link you winners up!
To celebrate this Tagline Kick-Off today, I’m leaving Robin’s inadvertant “seriously weird” one up for another week with her widget link directly under my bog eye — yes, that’s she in the photo as a child! Robin, the seriously wonderful gal of the Let’s Live Forever! blog and her partner Frank run a recording studio called The Sound Sculptor and Frank’s favorite fish is the Humphead Maori Wrasse at the Melbourne Aquarium!
And now, without further ado, drum-roll please, the deservant tagline winners are…
I’ll be putting all the taglines in my codfishing boot and drawing randomly to post the new taglines and widget links on Mondays.
For those of you who did not “win” this fame and glory contest, you’re ALL winners to me and will remain so. Forever and ever. xo And EVER!! I love you all.